Chapter 15 - Saga 3, Anything’s Fate
Entering the Caves
*
After a lengthy descent on steep grade, they were allowed access into the Dwarven Caves. Our New Fellowship crept forward, most of them having never set foot in the Caves before. DarkGuardian was beaming with pride, assuring them they’d love it, knowing they’d be impressed. YOYOY was busy signing something he’d just written, and waving it about. “Oh, isn’t it grand, the best you’ve seen?” The others looked at him quizzically, Archer frowning. “What’re you talking about?” YOYOY grinned. “The signature! Isn’t this the best signature you’ve ever seen?” A few frowned, then relenting and nodding in agreement. Acid_Flux smiled. “You’re right, it is. You should get some kind of award or something.”
They then ventured into the full glory of the Caves, as each neck craned upward, each eye widened, each jaw dropped. This main chamber of the Caves was stunning beyond words, an unimaginably vast opening in the earth, a dome that stretched across the boundaries of their vision, and for every dozen stories of city along its edges, a thousand feet of rising homeland, surely a million dwarves residing among the walls of this chamber alone, each abode marked by torchlight, almost giving the impression of an especially starry night, as innumerable points of light dotted their vision.
DarkGuardian slowly, dramatically spread his arms. “So, what do you guys think?” DarkKnightZach’s eyes darted about in wild wonder, though he’d been here before. All he could think was that nothing in Deverenia even came close. Shadowstar thought the same for the Free Kingdoms (although the Freeks aren’t known for their architecture in the least), Stormcrow managing to admire the darkness here, though not the same as the mortified angst you receive in a city of bone. Acid_Flux wondered if he’d ever see anything more grand in his service as a Space Marine. CardinalFang wondered if Haplo’s castle could fit entirely within, a riddle for the ages.
Advocate_of_Lycanthrope was jogging around crazily, head spastically jerking about, as if his mind had been snapped in two by the sight of the city. His eyes ablaze, drooling, muttering incomprehensible phrases, our group settled for staring at him, Drexlin offering a drink. The advocate then bent over and wailed, violently transforming into a giant penguin. He then cackled, seemingly mad with power, as he rose from the ground in a telekinetic fury, shooting off like a winged rocket, slowly receding into the distance as if he planned to attempt exploring every inch of the Caves.
Ter-Soth stood there silently, unmoved, unaffected, as usual. Archer trotted up to him, his joyous face falling. “You okay, boy scout?” He slapped the slightly-glowing being on the back, chuckling in jest. “I am beyond okay. I am reasonable. My mind has been reborn.” Archer withdrew his hand, slowly backing off, shuddering.
General_Lund giggled at the thought of falling from the canopy of the Caves, to utterly explode upon contact with the stony ground, only to be recreated as good as new. What fun it would be, he thought.
Archer walked over to DG, the dwarf nodding in silent agreement as the two walked off, leading the Fellowship on their own. They traversed the long path that lead to the council chambers, both confident in their stride. A master of miniatures politely smiled at their appearance. “Ah, tMmM! Been a while,” Archer remarked to the maker of miniatures. The former Guess That Card host turned to the current host, eyes narrowing. “And how has Guess That Card been, DarkGuardian?” DG briskly replied, “Oh, fine, it’s been great, no easy guesses recently!” He laughed nervously, gulping.
They were allowed into jscifert’s chambers, where their talk of Anything’s plight occurred comfortably, scifert well aware of DG’s fondness for that particular realm, an edge on their negotiations for potential aide. It was not a difficult sell, as dwarves are fond of games and lightheartedness, and you could say Anything is the biggest joke around. Soon Archer, jscifert, and DarkGuardian were all eagerly shaking hands, a common concern found in the fate of Anything, an appreciation gladly accepted, hoping no intervention would be necessary, though.
MatB grinned nearby, clearing his throat to get the troglodyte’s attention. Archer noticed and nodded in silent agreement, allowing DGuardian to leave.
Upon exiting the chamber, DG was met with the half-dwarf barkeep, whose face had the pale look of stark horror as he attempted to reiterate some news of great misfortune, DarkGuardian not understanding a single word, sufficing to follow the bartender as they ran.
It was not long before DG noticed the source of this distress. Apparently, a vast horde had invaded the Caves, as even now the alarm horns were blaring and mighty warriors were summoned to the defense of their realm.
Archer had already left MatB and was now aside DarkGuardian, cursing under his breath. “Why does this have to happen now, when-” He then stammered in sharp recognition of the figure leading the invading horde, noting that no dwarves had yet actually been attacked.
The commander bellow, “We are not here for you cave-dwellers, we come for the New Fellowship. We come for Archer.” He toothily sneered before continuing. “Come forth, Archer, and face a demon from your past.”
The former Army emperor plodded forward, furrowing his brow at stevenv, leader of the Indestructible Jonah Battalion, a remnant of Archer’s Army. Long ago, the battalion was lost, Archer never knowing why, though through secret murmurs word got around that it was only due to a mishandling of the map, as apparently the map-handling duties had been assigned to a peg-legged sailor gnome, whose title of Mappy didn’t necessarily indicate any cartography skill.
“What are you doing here, Steven?” The Army leftover, perhaps the last shard of another age, squinted in defiance. “You ran us into Other Games on purpose, you vile agent of betrayal. You left us for dead.” Archer blinked. “What are you talking about?!?” Stevenv grit his teeth. “You heard me, trog. You sent us on a death march! You aimed to get rid of me and my brigade out of unfounded hatred. You are the worst kind of scum, Archer.” Archer took a deep breath, trying not to become thoroughly enraged. “Steve…” He paused for a second, mulling things over in his head. He was already beginning to understand. “I don’t know what they told you, but they’re lying. They’re using you, they have another agenda on their hands. We’re out to save Anything, a land I know you love, and they’ve only-”
“Shut up.” The thousands of loyal minions behind stevenv cackled and giggled in a horrific chorus of malicious intent. “I’m not here to listen to your pitiful delusions of grandeur. You’ve always been so over-dramatic. I’m sick of it. This ends now.”
Archer began to object, only to have several arrows fired at him, a few of them lodging themselves in his flesh, the sharp pain causing the immense trog to wince and fall to his knees. Steven grinned cruelly, now looking down upon the frame of his former emperor as every single soldier behind him drew arms, the extent of the battalion unknown, as its rear guard extended outside the cave entrance.
The Fellowship rushed forward, each drawing weaponry, Acid Flux finding a pulse rifle to play with, YOYOY drawing his faithful club, DarkKnightZach and Stormcrow sighing, fully prepared to slaughter the minions all by themselves and keep tally in an effort to beat the other.
“No.”
General_Lund drew his sword, CardinalFang straightened his tie and combed his hair, ShadowStar wondered what weapon he possessed at all.
“No!”
Ter-Soth kept a safe distance, and AOL was nowhere to be found.
“No. No, no. No! No, no, no! No! No! No! No, no… no! No! No no no no no no NO! NO! NO, NO! NO! NOOO!! NO!!! NOOOO!!!!!!! NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!”
DarkGuardian rushed forward, effortlessly charging ahead of his comrades, muscles newly enlarging as he actually seemed to grow, his massive hammer even growing with him as he became something akin to a giant, as far as dwarves go. His muscles rippled, veins threatening to pop, knuckles refusing to turn white on the grip of his trusty sledge.
The other Fellowship members got the hint, drawing back to allow room for the one in their ranks who’d been doubly offended; at the assault on their leader, and thus their party, and also the rude mockery being made of the Dwarven Caves, as battle that concerned no dwarves threatened to take place in their hallowed home. The audacity wore thin on DG’s memory, instead replaced by a rage never seen before, and perhaps not to be seen again.
The dwarf roared, somehow managing to completely drown out the cries of the legion ahead of him. Archer had managed to retreat, so there was nothing between DarkGuardian and the advancing horde, something for which stevenv would pay.
What resulted was quite a spectacle, DG wielding his hammer as if it were an extension of his own being, just another limb, albeit gigantic and brutal. The first imp he nailed resulting in a streaming scream over the legion, a comet amidst the starlight above.
The next a bit more unfortunate, as he was actually hit backward, DG swinging as to hit him behind, as the demon screamed in horror, not hitting the ground for quite some time, and when he did, the skin was ripped from his body and he laid on the rock convulsing and moaning in abject pain, a sight causing a dwarven girl nearby to wretch and vomit and cry.
Oh, but DarkGuardian wasn’t done yet, not by far, and if you thought so, he’d have you knocked into next week. Speaking of which, he actually did that to a few of the minions, as they were hit so hard they ripped through a rift in the space-time continuum, disappearing from view, assuming never to be seen again.
It then became something like a baseball game, as in the grandstands around were seated thousands upon thousand of dwarf spectators, each cheering the mighty blows delivered by their hero below, the cheering resounding louder when a projectile was hit to them, a tidy souvenir. Sometimes they let the body hit and drop back the ground below, considering it an amazing feat of the victim managed to scream on the way down after initial impact. After all, for many of the minions, contact with the Cave walls was instant death, a spectacular explosion of atomized flesh and powdered bone.
This explosion often also happened on initial contact with DG’s hammer, managing to splay blood all over the dwarf, only driving him more mad, more crazed with bloodlust and battle fury. He we also managing to weave an impressive tapestry of obscenities and insults as he made his opinion of the invaders known to all around.
Each thunderous boom from the hammer strikes shook the bowels of the Fellowship crew, as they looked to each other in awe, afraid to voice mention of their own fear in this matter. YOYOY looked at his club and found it pathetic, putting it away, finding that he always favored the quill anyway.
StevenV had virtually been a statue for the skirmish so far, questioning his sight, refusing to believe that a meager dwarf was making a total mockery of his so-called Indestructible Battalion. As a commander, he wasn’t stupid, now finding it necessary to order a retreat, shaking his head in shame that they’d been beaten by a single dwarf.
They ran back, charging the cave threshold, only to find a dwarf army in their way, the short beings presumably finding it an honorable duty to defend the attack on the Fellowship, though more likely just to be a bit in bitter spirits at the upheaval of common decency when visiting the dwarven realm displayed by the Battalion.
Between them and sweet exit was a dwarven force led by a maniac up front, who was also supposedly a doctor. Yes, the infamous Dr. Demoniac himself, a sputtering giggling insanity of existence, screaming something about being ready to go all SMMMMMIIIIIIIIIIIIITE-happy on these asinine brutes.
The minions were stuck in a confused horror, unsure of whom to face. Meanwhile, DarkGuardian had caught up, and was pounding through their ranks, driving his targets forward through the masses, each broken body flung forward into the battalion, managing to kill several others, a game of dominoes on grand scale.
DG hadn’t yet broke a sweat as bolts were fired and swords swung and shurikens hurled and teeth biting. It was all nothing, like gnats buzzing against the hide of a rhinoceros. He didn’t give a crap. What he gave was punishment, a dish best served cold, and with a big ol’ hammer.
He then began to have fun, jumping about in ludicrous fashion as he drove the sledge straight down upon their skulls, their frail bodies bursting forth like gory watermelons, by now every solder screaming in pure terror, their jaws quivering along with their stomachs as their gut told them the present danger in a manner their mind could not, a grim apocalypse faced by the last splinter of Archer’s Army.
*
Many busted skulls, battered bodies, shattered spines, burst hearts, torn frames, powdered ribs, reversed limbs, splattered brains, and utterly gruesome killings later…
The Fellowship didn’t dare move, as the whole Caves resided in a current stillness, no voice speaking, no form moving. DarkGuardian slowly stomped over to the group, halting a relatively safe distance away. Safe, that is, for the Fellowship.
Archer gulped. “Well, that-”
DG interrupted, roaring, a dark, black, bloody bellowing that drove the Fellowship back and to their knees, CFang twitching pathetically in a fetal position. Ter-Soth even managed to blink.
DarkGuardian fumed, gasping through his nostrils, glancing around before bellowing again, “ADVOCATE, GET YOUR SORRY PENGUIN BUTT BACK HERE, NOW!!!”
A large penguin set an airspeed record as he suddenly appeared back with the Fellowship, transforming back into his former self, pitifully sobbing in broken fear.
DG turned to his dwarven brethren and offered a slow wave and respectful bow.
“Let’s move on.”
Archer rolled his eyes and grumbled as they filed out, then shrugging, figuring he should maybe even dare to be grateful for this, er, other side of DarkGuardian.
The gentle trog sighed deeply, wondering where this would end. He looked up, spacing into nowhere in particular, as if half-expecting for Todd to appear and answer all his questions, set his mind at ease as Anything would be restored.
Archer shook his head and continued marching forward, for once bringing up the humble rear of their group. Acid_Flux slowed his pace, now beside Arch.
“Archer, I’ve been thinking…†The troglodyte smiled. “What?†Archer shook his head, “I’m sure we all have. Me and DarkGuardian were talking about it after Deverenia. I’d talk to him now, but…â€
The two chuckled, Archer continuing. “What’s on your mind, NoThRoG?†The sharpshooter shrugged. “I’m just wondering how we’ve been attacked with such precision, our location in all of Lore seemingly not a secret. Am I correct in assuming that only the members of our Fellowship know where we are at any given time?â€
Archer solemnly nodded. “As I told DG, yes, but I did tell Kelanor of our quest before leaving Anything. And then there’s the matter of this orb…†He drew JWalker’s gift from his pocket. “I wouldn’t be surprised if he was capable of tracking us with this. But I doubt he’s the one who’s instigated the fall of Anything.â€
Acid_Flux frowned. “What do you mean?†Archer ****ed his head. “Well, I mean, I don’t think JWalker could initiate the corrosion of an entire realm.†Acid continued frowning, “I’m still confused.†He paused for a second. “Are you assuming that whoever knows our position and has thus been able to assist in these attacks, and whoever is behind the fall of Anything, are the same person?â€
Archer stopped in his tracks. Actually, yes, he had assumed that, so far. But now, with Acid’s words, he realized as Acid did, that there could merely be a sympathizer within their ranks…
“So, what you’re saying is, someone in our group is working rather like a double agent? Giving our position to the one who’s behind the destruction of Anything?â€
Acid grinned in a thoroughly arcane manner. They both looked ahead to the group, Archer remembering the pause him and DarkGuardian previously took to consider who would have the means of betraying them in that manner.
“Someone’s a dirty little snitch.â€
*
© Eric Bailey